Joyful. Patient. Faithful.

AM Psalm [83] or 146 • PM Psalm 85, 86
Gen. 27:30-45 • Rom. 12:9-21 • John 8:21-32

Please grant me the liberty of a little whine.

I have Covid, and I was very sick...for four days. That said, I have been unwell for over two weeks now and frankly it’s growing a bit tiresome. I am impatient for my life to be back to “normal.” I am weary of blowing my nose, of coughing, of becoming exhausted with the smallest of household chores, of falling asleep sitting on the sofa or sitting anywhere, of being alone. Frankly, I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired! Isn’t that interesting.

I am also exhausted with the nagging question of “why.” Why has this pandemic been visited upon the world and so many lives lost, some in a most indiscriminate way? Yes, it’s on my mind and yours if you’re honest. Where is God in our time of greatest need? However, many have a natural reluctance to talk openly about this fearing that simply asking the questions will make God mad, and we’ll never get rid of this thing. Subconsciously runs the thought, “Let’s not take the chance.” How telling.

Then there’s this:

Be
Joyful in hope,
Patient in affliction,
Faithful in prayer.

Romans 12:12.

There is hope, and we have seen it in action. And there have been prayers! Yours and mine. We prayed for our family, friends, neighbors, church, nation, the scientists, our healthcare system and the rest of quite a long list. We’ve all asked God for help in dealing with this “situation.” I mustered all the faith I had in those long months of isolation. And I found patience and solace in the hope that one day it would all be fine.

Due to my challenged immune system, for two years now I have been terrified of getting Covid. I have been extremely cautious, much to the stunning (and infuriating) bemusement of a couple of my friends. I got vaccinated as soon as I could and have received two boosters. Without those wonders of science and a very attentive doctor things would have been very different. It is also clear that I would have been in serious shape if I had caught it in the early months. This is true for so many. I should be rejoicing. Our prayers are obviously not bouncing off the ceiling.

I eventually found the confidence, in the quiet of my morning prayers, to ask “why.” The broad-based suffering of the pandemic and the many other horrible things I see going on in the world right now are so antithetical to what I believe about God; I had to ask. Asking is not wrong. As a matter of fact, a lot of our most meaningful discussions and understandings about faith and hope come from asking questions, particularly that one. And I have become comfortable with the knowledge that I will never have an “adequate” answer—an acceptable answer, yes.

We are all mortal, and our lives on this planet in these bodies is a temporary thing. As Paul has noted in several places, eventually heaven and earth will be changed. “The night is nearly over; the day is almost here.” Romans 13:12. I’ve learned that rather than focus on the answer to “why,” I need to rest in the confidence that no matter what prompts the question, God is with me and with all of us, always. Rabbi Irving Greenberg said it best in his book The Life of Meaning: Reflections on Faith, Doubt, and Repairing the World, “I said to myself I’d asked the wrong question when I asked where was God? The answer was obvious; where else would God be, but suffering with God’s people?” You see we are God’s children, created in God’s image, and God loves us dearly. When we hurt, God hurts. When we are joyful, God rejoices with us. Earlier in Romans Paul says,

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in creation (including a pandemic), will be able to separate us from the love of God, that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39 (parenthetical mine).

I have Covid and was very sick for four days. Four days! Revisiting this and the rest of the above realities, I am embarrassed by my current annoyance. Let me now return to my patient, faithful existence, ever abiding in hope. I do not know how God is working but the realization that God is working gives me the power to get through anything.

Thanks be to God!

Written by Dennis McKinnie

...who is grateful for the “cushion” in our Morning Refection deadlines—for obvious reasons.