A Letter from Suzanne

FROM THE ASSOCIATE RECTOR

Joy. That’s the gift and the memory that shines brightest as I write today. A pulse of joy, a current of joy, at times an uncontainable eruption of joy.

Evan teases that in every Episcopal Church some clergy will inevitably quote from what he light-heartedly calls The Gospel according to Brené Brown. This is that day at St. Paul’s. Brené Brown is a research professor of Social Work at the University of Houston (she’s also a good Episcopalian). Her work has led her to identify the gifts of courage, compassion, and connection as essential to living wholeheartedly, keys to living authentic and fulfilling lives. The desire to explore what it means to be fully alive and to live in meaningful relationship with God and one another is a project and a path dear to us in this parish.

Wholehearted living is something we can only practice; it’s not a destination so much as it is an orientation. In The Gifts of Imperfection Brown writes, “It’s like walking toward a star in the sky. We never really arrive, but we certainly know [when] we’re headed in the right direction.” And, in support of that life-long process, she a offers practices to help us find our way toward authenticity, self-compassion, resilience, faith, creativity, rest, calm, laughter, meaningful service, gratitude and joy.

This week I’ve found myself appreciating Brown’s distinction between happiness and joy. Happiness comes and goes. It comes when some situation or event calls it out. It goes when the moment inevitably passes. Joy abides: It is “tethered to our hearts by spirit and gratitude.” She quotes Adela Rogers St. Johns: “Joy seems to me a step beyond happiness. Happiness is a sort of atmosphere you can live in sometimes when you’re lucky. Joy is a light that fills you with hope and faith and love.”  

I have been happy at St. Paul’s but, more importantly, you have helped me to know joy. I am tethered to you and to God in spirit and gratitude. In a few days I will move onto a new path as I take leave of St. Paul’s and begin to discover new possibilities to pursue the faithful and joyful ways of living you have taught and revealed to me as we have worked and prayed and grieved and laughed and worshiped together. I do not know what that will mean and where that path will lead me, but then I had not the slightest clue what was in store for me—the wondrous turns my life would take—when I took those first tentative steps into this community 33 years ago.

I do have an absolute and joyful confidence that Evan, Sara, and the extraordinary staff at St. Paul’s will continue to provide faithful leadership, loving pastoral care, spiritually enriching formation, and, even more than that, will continue to support each of you as you explore how God is calling you to serve one another and those outside our walls.

This is not goodbye. After a year or more I will be back in this place and among the people whom I love so very much. I will be back where I began—in the pews, with Elliott and with you, incomparably blessed to be there and to have known such joy as a member of this holy family.

With a heart full of gratitude, joy, and love,

Suzanne