Seeking Belonging
FROM THE ASSOCIATE RECTOR
When we meet as a church staff and wonder about the needs of our parish, “connection” and “belonging” are recurrent topics. When I speak with folks who are new to St. Paul’s, at the top of their list of questions is about how to get involved, which is shorthand, I believe, for “How do I meet people and develop meaningful relationships?” So when I received an email from a friend asking me to fill out a survey about belonging in Northwest Arkansas, I took it. (The survey, sponsored by EngageNWA of the NWA Council, is open for anyone in NWA to take.) Truthfully, I wanted to know how others are measuring something that everyone seeks: belonging.
When we have our Let’s Get Acquainted gathering this Sunday at 10:00 am in my office, I promise there won’t be a survey! But there will be folks who are new or newer to our church. We hope that we can envelop them in hospitality and potentiality without drowning them in information. In the limited time, it’s a finite window to share some of our religious journey and what folks are seeking and also get a glimpse at the generous offerings St. Paul’s offers.
Do our offerings encourage belonging? Hearkening to the survey I took, belonging involves: emotional connection; welcome and inclusion in activities; influence in decision-making; being able to showing up as one’s whole and authentic self; being valued; satisfying relationships; feeling like an insider who has understanding of the place; being comfortable expressing opinions; and equal treatment with others. This list likely doesn’t convey all aspects of belonging, but it’s a good start. Fortunately, as I reflect on what we offer at St. Paul’s, all of what we do fosters a sense of belonging.
But what we do in theory may not show up in practice, at least not without effort. Belonging is relational. It takes one person speaking to another and having an exchange long enough to generate trust to build a relationship. At Let’s Get Acquainted, we share meaningful stories and pass along a Ministry Fair Directory, but if people don’t connect beyond that, it was just a passing transaction. As Bishop John Harmon has said before, we’re not about transactional acts in our Church; we seek transformation. Belonging changes lives.
As we approach the start of a new school year, there will be an increase of new faces in church and in the community. I hope that new folks come to our Let’s Get Acquainted hour and that others who have been around a bit longer will volunteer to share in stories and fostering a sense of belonging or at least help in showing the way. That’s what we’re all doing, making our way one relationship at a time, nearer to Christ, closer to God, which is where we all belong.
Sara +