How Do I Connect with St. Paul’s?

FROM THE RECTOR

During the pandemic, we had a hard time staying in touch with each other. When in-person worship stopped and our office closed, we continued our live-stream services, and we experimented with things like online Bible studies and even Zoom coffee hours. (Remember that?) Not surprisingly, however, far fewer people found virtual gatherings spiritually fulfilling. Thankfully, we no longer worry about suspending in-person activities, but the struggle to stay connected with each other and our church family during that time has helped me reconsider the nature of belonging to a church like St. Paul’s.

We are a big church—too big for all of us to know each other well. In fact, with a pre-pandemic average Sunday attendance of nearly 500 people, we are too big for any one of us to know everyone’s name. (Believe me: I’ve tried.) Even if someone were to show up every week, there is no way for them to know the church and be known by the church unless they find another way to connect—unless they belong to a smaller group within the congregation.

Although we are a big church, we are actually a big church made up of tiny congregations. Each smaller group—the altar guild, the youth group, a Bible study, kitchen volunteers, or the choir—is a community of love, prayer, support, and belonging. If your only connection with St. Paul’s is Sunday-morning worship, when hundreds of people show up, how will the church know if you receive a difficult diagnosis, change jobs, lose a loved one, or celebrate a new grandbaby? Sure, you can call the church and let us know—and we hope that you will—but there is something good and holy about belonging to an intimate pastoral community that shares deeply in each other’s lives.

That level of connection is not possible in a group of five hundred people. It does not even work in a gathering of one hundred or even fifty individuals. Think about how small a group needs to be in order for you to notice right away who is missing when that group gets together. Think about how many people could be in a room together and you know enough about each one to anticipate how you might pray for them. Finding a real home like that in a church like ours requires you to find another, smaller, more personal way of connecting.

This Sunday at our annual Ministry Fair, we will celebrate all the ways that we stay connected with each other in those smaller groups. Weather permitting, we the fair will take place on the green space by the playground from 11:00 a.m. until 1:30 p.m.. If it rains, we will move into the parish hall. We will have a potluck lunch, so bring a dish to share. You will have a chance to walk around the fair, play various carnival-style games, and learn about the ministries of our church. Not all of our ministries will be represented, but you will get a good idea of how many ways there are to belong to St. Paul’s. Although each of those ministries could use you, finding a ministry is mostly about finding a way to connect with others.

In the middle of the pandemic, when no one was sharing pastoral concerns with us on their way out of church, the clergy felt an urgent need to renew contact with every household in the parish. You might remember that we recruited many individuals, each of whom made dozens of phone calls to all the households in our congregation. You might not realize that, despite an inordinate amount of work, that plan was only moderately successful. We struggled because we were trying artificially to lay a small-group framework onto a congregation that was simply too big. We would have been better served to reach out to the leaders of all our ministries and encourage them to stay in touch with their people so that those people would feel that renewed connection.

Part of me wants our church to be small and intimate enough for everyone to know how everyone else is doing—for no pastoral concerns to go unnoticed—but that is not possible. If you have felt neglected these last few years, I am sorry. Nothing pains me more than hearing that someone who loves St. Paul’s does not feel loved by St. Paul’s. The only solution I know, however, is for you to make meaningful pastoral connections with our church, and the best way to do that is to find a small group to join.

If we do not have an existing ministry that appeals to you, reach out to me or another member of staff and suggest a new one. If you cannot come to the Ministry Fair this Sunday, look for our Ministry Directory online or in the Welcome Center or read about our various programs on our website. Reach out to the leader of one of the ministries or ask a member of staff how you can get involved.

If you only want to show up on a Sunday and worship with us, you are most welcome. You do not need to sign up for anything in order to be a part of our congregation. No matter how involved you are, if you need any sort of pastoral care, all you need to do is call the church office and ask for it. We will always care for you. But, if you want to belong to this church in a deeper way—the sort of way in which people know you by name and check on you and invite you around for supper—look for a ministry to join. The only way to really belong in a church this big is by being a part of a smaller congregation within it, and I believe that there is a place for all of us here.


Yours Faithfully,

Evan D. Garner

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