Good To Be Back

FROM THE RECTOR

Last Sunday was my first Sunday at St. Paul’s in three months, and it was indescribably good to be back. I have missed working, worshipping, laughing, and playing in the church I love. I must confess that going to a welcome back reception made me feel a little guilty. After three months of sabbatical, the reception felt like an over-indulgent gift on top of gift, but being back with you in that celebratory setting helped me experience the love, encouragement, and enthusiasm that we share for what God is doing in our parish.

At the reception, someone asked me if anything had surprised me while I was away. During my travels, I experienced many little surprises—the sort of small, unexpected insights that make any unfamiliar journey rewarding—but I named one overarching surprise that has only come into focus in the last few weeks. In a way I never could have anticipated three months ago, I am overwhelmingly excited to be back at St. Paul’s.

Before the sabbatical started, I could have told you that I would look forward to coming back. I could have guessed that I would be ready for a return to the normal rhythms of parish ministry. I could have said that I would be excited about being back among the people I love and doing the things I love to do. But I could not have imagined how strong and deep the pull to be back in this parish with you has become.

I love St. Paul’s. I enjoyed seeing other congregations, hearing other preachers, and worshipping in other settings. I enjoyed learning how other parishes do the same things we do, each with their own distinctive flair. I was warmly and graciously received by colleagues and members of other parishes, who allowed me to come into their churches as if I belonged to them. But none of them was home. Nowhere else do I experience the same joyful, rewarding, soul-nourishing sense of belonging that I do at St. Paul’s, and for that I am eternally grateful.

St. Paul’s was a great parish before I got here, and it will remain a great parish long after I leave (whenever that is). My three-month absence from our church not only made my heart grow fonder but, in a strange and unexpected way, deepened the connection I feel with our church. I feel more a part of the life of our parish than before in part because I have discovered again how much St. Paul’s is a part of me. By keeping some space between us this summer, we have invited a new season of shared growth.  

That growth, however, will take a little more time. I have not returned with lots of ideas for how we can do things even better. I did not spend any time this summer making lists of new initiatives or dreaming up new ministries. That was not the purpose of this sabbatical. Instead, like ground that is left fallow, these three months were a consecrated period of holy rest and renewal. When a farmer returns to a field that has remained unplanted and untended, there is no expectation that new seeds will have already sprouted—only that the weeds and grass that have grown up will need to be cleared out so that new seeds can be scattered on the ground.

I may need a week or two to get back into the swing of things, but I believe that what lies ahead of us will be good. I have returned with a renewed sense of who I am as a child of God, as a priest in the church, and as your rector. I have been filled again with a deep appreciation for what God has done, is doing, and will do among us. I am grateful for the gift that this summer was, and I trust that it will bear fruit in good time.

Yours Faithfully,

Evan D. Garner