Filled with Faithfulness

AM: Psalm 80 • 1 Samuel 16:1-13 • 1 John 2:18-25
PM: Psalm 33;1 Samuel 12:1-5 • Acts 20:17-35

In employment parlance, backfilling is putting someone in a vacated position, rather than eliminating the role and distributing its responsibilities among others. Appropriated thus, this term for literally re-filling an excavated hole with earth can sound dehumanizing. My current job was not a backfill, and I feel a certain sense of pride in that, knowing that the hole I leave if/when I leave my position was the one that I created and filled with myself in the first place.

Matthias replaced Judas to restore the apostles' number to 12. Maybe having an even dozen was important to the remaining 11. Maybe he backfilled Judas' role as keeper of the money bag. Little is known about Matthias, so we can assume he didn’t distinguish himself in the same way Judas did. He didn't have the same opportunity to betray the living human Jesus, but his martyrdom with the remaining apostles (save John) testifies to the fact that he didn’t betray Jesus after the Ascension either.

The Collect for Matthias emphasizes his status as an active deliverer rather than mere filler: "Grant that your Church, being delivered from false apostles, may always be ordered and guided by faithful and true pastors." We all know of pastors being replaced after scandals, maybe within our own churches. But the bittersweet event of replacing a beloved pastor is also tumultuous. The challenge of serving on St. Paul's rector search committee in 2018 will stay with me forever, and Suzanne’s retirement in January struck most if not all of us very deeply. The pressures on Evan and now Sara may be quite different from those on Matthias, but they aren’t lightened by the fact that they don’t have to deliver the congregation from false predecessors. “Faithful and true pastors” leave the widest chasms of all.

Written by Kathryn Haydon

Kathryn holds a doctorate in Plant Science from the University of Arkansas and currently lives in St. Louis where she works as a food and plant scientist, sings in the St. Peter’s Ladue choir, and shares a book-filled home with Nathan, Ollie, and the memory of her constant reading companion Adair.

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